Undercover Blogger…Shhhhh, Don’t Tell Anyone You Read This!

It’s always tricky blogging while at work. I have to do it “Gorilla Style” and my strategies end up resembling some Revolutionary in South America: always on the move, ambush at random, retreat into the jungles and move out!

Undercover Blogger

Who am I kidding?  If I were part of a Revolution, it would probably look like this:

"Viva La Rvueootiln!"

(I”m the dopey grunt on the right, btw)

Blogging at work is a sure sign of addiction, especially if you do sneaky things like actually write the blog in a Microsoft Outlook Email so it “Looks” like you are hard at work.  Then, when the blog is finished, just Copy and Paste quickly before publishing.

Of course there is always the “Minimize” Trick which is making your work homepage Maximized to fill the screen and then Minimize your blog to fit a small corner on the lower right hand side of the screen. The funny thing is, I’m not sure why I’m being all uber sneaky anyway. It’s not like IT doesn’t already KNOW that the wordpress.com http addresses keeps popping up under my login, but no one has pulled me into HR for a heart to heart with the director.  I suppose as long as you are not downloading porn in your cubicle, they really don’t care.

Then again, I heard about some poor guy in Accounting who was fired last fall because he checked his Fantasy Football scores Monday morning.  Corprate reasoning went something like this: Fantasy Football costs money to join and there is a cash prize for the winner that is greater than the investment. Ergo, Fantasy Football = Gambling and this poor chap was caught Gambling at work. Personally, I think the team leader for Accounts Receivable was once given a massive wedgie in the High School Cafeteria by the Football Team while the Cheerleaders all giggled at him and he’s hated jocks ever since. So, when the opportunity presented itself, all he could see through his bloodshot eyes of rage was the face of that Quarterback. 

Poor Paul. I miss you, buddy. 

So here I sit, Undercover Blogger that I am. And to think, there are some people out there who actually get paid for this! 

But it’s Friday and the Owner is not here. Nor is her husband. Nor are two of the Sales Reps. Nor is ANYONE in Production. It’s pretty much me, and some weird guy who reminds me of Dilbert. Or perhaps that guy from “Office Space” who lost his beloved red stapler. You remember, he was the guy who was laid off during a corporate cut back 5 years ago, but through some glitch in Accounting he kept receiving his checks.

Yeah, that’s him, MILTON!

Now, if I am ever laid off from this position due to corporate cutbacks (or HR being notified that I’ve been blogging on the job) I ran across some inspiration.  There is a freelance writer out there who wrote a book called “Canned, How I Lost Ten Jobs In Ten Years And Learned To Love Unemployment.”

After being fired from everything from the overnight shift at a XXX Movie Store, Telemarketer, and File Clerk, Franklin Schncider took the plunge all of us dream about: He wrote a book and is now a casual, part time freelance writer & part time bum. Evidently after his company laid him off, he collected 102 weeks of consecutive unemployment benefits. He was required by law to be actively looking for a new job during this time, which he dutifully fulfilled his obligation by sending out resumes filled with typos, bad fonts and emoticons. 

🙂 😉 😦 (.)(.)

(Get your mind out of the gutter!  Those are GOOGLY EYES, for cryin’ out loud!)

He wrote a book about his experiences  and has been living off of the cash advance and his freelance writing ever since.

Live the dream, Frank. Live the dream!

So tell me, do you find yourself Blogging Undercover?  Have you ever had to be sneaky about it, like an addict shoving needles under his mattress? 

Please, tell me your secrets!

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15 thoughts on “Undercover Blogger…Shhhhh, Don’t Tell Anyone You Read This!

  1. Ha! This was funny, Aaron. At least your employer doesn’t block wordpress and other blogger sites. This was a great blog. I don’t have to worry about being sneaky at work. I blog the night before (usually after 10:00) in a rush before my husband starts complaining that the light from my laptop is keeping him awake. I just can’t write beforehand like Kristin Lamb suggested. That would be too much pressure for me. And I’m a “J” on the Myers-Briggs, so I can’t believe I write by the seat of my pants instead of six weeks in advance like most “J”‘s proabably would. Keep up the good work!

    • Alas, my laptop went ‘kaput’ a LONG time ago and I’ve never got around to replacing it. Between my Sony Playstation 3 and a new flat screen TV, there always seemed to be something else more important to get. So I still bang everything out on my old desktop and my wife can sleep in peace.

      I’m still looking forward to your Myers-Briggs post!

    • Hey SARAH, I tend to mull them over in my mind for about a week, letting them simmer for a few nights, add in a dash of inspiration the morning of the big post and let it cook at 350 degrees until the post comes out golden brown.

      Then, I serve it up for your reading pleasure!

      • Okay, really digging the cooking analogy… maybe a blog all its own on that?

        Glad I don’t have to undercover blog, as I do all mine at home. Though when I worked at the movie theater I was forever with a notebook, scribbling away when there were no customers at my box office window.

    • ELLIE, that’s what a notebook is for, my dear! I met one blogger who carries around a recorder so she can make mental notes of great blogs as she goes about her day, doing whatever it is professional writers do all day. I found my phone works great for that.(Yes, there is an APP for that!)

  2. I usually have to hide my blogging activities from myself.

    Sounds weird? Yes, it is. It goes like this:

    Morning. Time to get to work.

    Just checking on my blog before I get started. Only take a sec.

    – Answer comments
    – Check subscriptions
    – Start reading

    Charlotte, what are you doing? Is that work?

    Yes. Yes, it is absolutely work. This is important for my career. I’m working.

    Oh, right. Carry on then.

    – Read more
    – Comment
    – Open a ‘new post’ window

    Isn’t this taking a bit long? I thought you had other work to do today.

    Yea, just a sec. This was on the agenda. Seriously.

    Ah, must’ve missed it. Carry on.

    – Write post. Edit.
    – Edit post again.
    – Schedule.

    …….. two hours later.

    Awesome, look at all that WORK I’ve already done today.

    • CHARLOTTE, That is a GREAT agenda! It sounds a whole lot better than mine that is usually filled with about 40 personal emails I’ve not responded to, 60 general emails I’ve left sitting for about 24 hours, 15 new messages on my voice mail and over 50 clients I should have gotten back to yesterday!

      If I send you my resume, could you put in a good word for me at your company!

  3. Man, you caught me. Most of the time I blog ahead of time and schedule it! Like 98% of the time, but I’m totally guilty of blogging at work… I’m also the only person at my location…

  4. (stands up timidly and looks at the floor). My name is Jared and I am a blogoholic. Ha ha! I love this. I never quite thought of it this way. Thank you for showing me the light. I, too, am a problem blogger. I am glad to be among friends here. This is a great blog, my friend, I loved it.
    Oh and P.S. ~ I don’t think those were googly eyes. Pervert. 🙂
    P.P.S. ~ Keep coming back, it works if you work it!

  5. Hey CHRISTI: I know his name is Milton. I refrenced the name in my blog. I stil think it is one of the funniest movies of all time!

    Thank you for stopping by.

    Keep in touch.

  6. I’m so glad to know I’m not the only person who pulls this kind of stuff. I personally employ the “write it out in Word beforehand” method. I even innovated my sneak blogging by making sure I typed out all the tags in the word document that could be pasted in too (I learned that the hard way, when I got off scott free with the actual post, but was caught key stroking in the tabs and commas).

    I have never thought of the Outlook post method though, I think I just added to my arsenal!

  7. Hi, spectacular article liked a lot indeed,I think we could became blog budies lol!
    Anyway my name is Felipe, as you, I write on the internet, even tought my blog theme is a lot different from this…..
    I make poker blogs about poker without deposit……..
    Learned a lot here

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